 |
|
|
|
|
 |
|
|
| From time
to time, someone sends me an e-mailmessagecontaining
funny stuff — a collection of funny bumper stickers, one of real epitaphs,
a joke.
Sometimes it's a poignant piece. Sometimes it's something uplifting, inspirational. But funny or poignant or uplifting or inspirational, they have one thing in common — they all look like hell. So I started reformatting them. Picking typefaces. Adding graphics. Laying them out in a visually interesting way. When I was done, I would send them to friends in their new form. And then people started asking me for copies. Weeeell, it got to be expensive after a while. Getting stuff printed usually is. So I hit upon the idea of putting the stuff on the Internet. Now, if someone wants a copy, I give him/her the related URL instead. He/she can then take a look at it, and print it out if he/she wishes. Now, what you will see on-screen is more or less the same as the original in some cases. Not in others. I won't get into why. It's not important. Only the content is. Sooooo, here's one of them. Enjoy! Enjoy! |
|
|
assigned to a training squadron of which I was a part had been at sea on
maneuvers in heavy weather for several davs. I was serving on the lead
battleship and was on bridge watch as night fell. Visibility was poor because
of some patchy fog. And so the captain had decided to remain on the bridge
where he could keep an eye on everything that happened.
Shortly after dark, the bridge lookout reported: “Light bearing on the starboard bow.” “Is it steady or moving astern?” the captain called out. “Steady, captain,” the lookout replied, which meant that we were on a collision course with another ship. The captain immediately called to the signaI-nan, “Signal that ship that we're on a collision course, and advise that they change course 20 degrees.” He did. Back came a signal, “Advisable for you to change course 20 degrees.” At which the captain said, "Send: I'm a captain. Change course 20 degrees.” “I'm only a seaman, second-class,” was the reply. “But I think you had better change course 20 degrees.” By that time, the captain was furious. He spat out, “Send: I'm a battleship. Change course 20 degrees.” Back came the flashing light, “I'm a lighthouse.” We changed course. |
 |
|
|
 |
|
|
 |
Is freedom from the tyranny of words, which means regaining control of your life, worth the price of a good dinner? If you believe that it is, click on the image to the left. (Don't worry, doing so isn't going to lock you into anything.) If you don't believe that it is, then I can't help you. No one can. But remember, you only get one shot at life. And if that one shot is spent in unhappiness, frustration, under continual stress, in poor health, and so on, well, it's your own bloody fault for not doing anything about it. |
|
|
| Addresses (US Mail and e-mail) and telephone numbers (voice and fax) of the Mens Sana Foundation. |
 |
 |
 |