Mens Sana Foundation

seems that everyone is a victim these days. A victim of racism, of the "inner child," of an imperfect judicial system, of a nonperforming educational system, of a belligerent spouse, of a brutal or uncaring parent, of a greedy employer, of a shrinking economy, of sexism, of whatever.

I think it’s getting to the point where the title "victim" will soon replace the titles "Mr." and "Ms." So there’ll no longer be a Mr. Charley Smith or Ms. Helen Wilson, but rather Victim Charley Smith and Victim Helen Wilson.

What’s happening here?

First, let’s take a look at what it takes to be a victim.

Webster says that a "victim" is someone who is injured at the hands of another. Sounds about right.

So if someone punches you in the nose or hits you with a baseball bat, then, clearly, you’re a victim. I’ll buy that.

But suppose someone calls you a name or heaps verbal abuse on you or taunts you or lies to you. Are you a victim? I don’t see how you could be. Not if you accept Webster’s definition.

You see, when someone says something to you, you must first give meaning to what he or she said. Second, you must decide that it was offensive. And finally, assuming you did decide that it was offensive, you must then choose to be offended. If you choose not to be offended, then how can you be a victim?

So in the final analysis, where words are concerned, being victimized is a matter of choice. Your choice.

And it better be your choice. Because if it’s someone else’s, then he or she owns you.

Speech code, anyone?

Think about it.